this and that...

My cousins baby shower is tomorrow. I'm not going but feel ok about it. Even ran into her tonight while shopping her registry for the gift for tomorrow(tiny bit embarassed because 1) she saw what was in my basket and knows what I'm getting her now, and 2) she knows I waited till the very last possible second to get her anything. I haven't seen her for oh say 2-3 months and boy has she blew up, but oh so cute. She's soooo tiny with this big 'ole round hard bump. I smiled, and didn't even have to fake it. If this is what being at peace feels like, than me likes it. I shopped the baby section for a good 15 minutes trying to find the last few things that werne't horribly expensive that haven't been bought yet. And I survived. Didn't even break a sweat. Man, I'm getting good at this acceptance thing. And truthfully, I have serious doubts about her ability to be a good mother BUT I hope she will be. And I am excited for her, and happy for her. Truely. Oh, the registry. PLEASE! OMG, she registered for some of the dumbest stuff, a glade candle in a vanilla scent, a zip up robe for herself, p.js for her, NIPPLE CREAM, nursing bras. Call me old fashioned but arn't those strange requests? Its not her day(well kinda)but mostly its the babys. Not that she isn't important but I'd rather get gifts for the baby, after all its a baby shower, not her bday. Am I wrong here?.....She registered for 1 lousy package of diapers. ONE. Yep, she's clueless. I don't think she realizes the first few weeks are filled with eating,crying and pooping. lots and lots of poop....


Our(dh & I) birthdays are coming up Monday. YiPeeee. I wish I didn't feel this way about bdays. I wish I felt like celebrating but I just don't want to get any older. I know people in their 30s or 40s would give anything to be 28 again, I get that. Just like I would love to be 25 again. Maybe I need to forget about them for good. Not even acknowledge the day. I don't know why I feel like this, up until my 24th or 25th bday, I loved having bdays. Now, not so much. Its not like I have a bad life, I don't. In fact, I've got a pretty peachy life. I love my husband more and more with each passing day. I have purpose. I am luckier than many-possibly even more lucky than most. Bdays are just life, right?....No real plans for the day, we both have to work. D had said something about taking me to our favorite japenese restaurant later on in the week. Guess we'll see.

It is soooo FALL here. I love it. Its been absolutely beautiful! The past 2 days or so the trees have really started changing. I love autumn. I tolerate the cold and the rain and the illness I just got over that visits every year around this time cuz I have no other choice but the beautiful colors of the trees almost makes all that worth while.

My dog is just the coolest thing ever. He's so stinkin' smart, it kills me sometimes. Would love to go into more detail with a couple of his latest antics and stories but my droopy eyes along with truckers attempts to wiggle in between me and the laptop(jealousy, i can't pet him and type at the same time) are telling me that will all have to wait.